Write Makes Right, Right?
I’m seeing the problem: I’m writing my life the way it is and not the way I want it to be, but for some reason I can’t stop. Maybe you have to really understand the past and present before you can write the future, I think. So I keep writing:
Renee’s husband was not the only one to benefit from this situation; Renee had to acknowledge there were definite pleasures associated with having money. One of her favorites was the ability to hire things done that she detested doing herself. And then there was the perfect house and the extravagant garden, replete with a fish pond inhabited by a large white koi named Mary. Still, Renee could not ignore the increasing restlessness that haunted the crevices of her life.
When at last the crevices began to look more like fault lines ready to break open with any new stressor, Renee decided it was time to retrieve the old dreams from the shelf, dust them off and consider how they might be actualized. Travel was a necessary part of her visions. Providing enlightenment to others was an equally important aspect, but it had to be subtle. She refused to be a preacher or even a teacher again. No, what she wanted to do was infiltrate a group, occasionally making observations and then watch to see if anyone was paying attention. If so, she would go on to make more observations, or more likely to tell a story, because at heart, that’s who she was—a storyteller. A true story would be best, but if she had to make one up or tell someone else’s story, well so be it. In the final analysis, plagiarism is egregious only if it serves the plagiarist alone and not the good of the larger community. Right?
Now that her decision was made, it was left to determine how to proceed. Tidiness in making the transition to her new life was imperative. Her husband, grown daughter and her family were still important, as was her house and garden; the money, although not totally necessary, was a welcome perk, even though she had already envisioned herself as an itinerant philosopher-storyteller dependent on the kindness of those she entertained and helped. To avoid disruption, what if she began her journey toward the dream with some day trips to interesting but out-of-the-way places, where she would be likely to find people open to introspection?
OK, now we are getting somewhere: dissatisfaction, ideas about how to change things!
(to be continued)